In a recent study certain non-bogus researchers found that there is 0% of interest in you. This data can be interpreted as 'go away and find someone else to bug'. The researchers recommend that you buy this statistics t-shirt now to show your apathy.
Better than having 100% horse meat on your beef burger right? At least 70% of that horse can still go to the rodeo and potentially win for Best Neigh. Get this burger t-shirt to show that you care about how beefy those patties should be.
Still waiting for your powers? While waiting for your ability to destroy the business district particularly that one bank that wouldn't give you that loan for your 'Small Hadron Collider' why don't you wear this hazard warning t-shirt first?
Hey! At least someone's industrious enough to think up that title. If it's not for girls or video games there's not much reason to STOP being lazy. For the guy who won't leave their manholes (or caves whatever) this ironic t-shirt fits great.
118 119 do you still here those numbers being yelled together with your morning coffee? Buy this shirt in memory of those adverts from 2003. Who knows maybe people will still find it phony (get it?).
This football t-shirt lets you go back to when it was a good sport and not a 'watch me get hit by an invisible car' competition. Care to see that controversial 1966 hat trick the only one of its kind? It's on YouTube! Welcome says CharGrilled.
Going dry is a tough challenge especially when beer and wine is so nice. ...actually a beer sounds great. I'll try again tomorrow!
bUt 1 4lr34dy g0t l41d Is something that you might say in your defense but it is to everyone's knowledge that a certain class in speaking and writing will allow you to successfully get your leg over. Do purchase this geeky t-shirt as a good tip.
Up to this day nobody knows if there is a correlation between being drunk almost all of the time and the increased sighting of wish-granting green-clothed midgets. Show your patriotism with this Irish T-Shirt!
It would've made a fine children's song if it wasn't about booze. Anyway wear this shots t-shirt at your next party for a dose of funny truth. Unless you're from Russia or Germany in which case 7 tequila shots is just the start of the party.
2b or not 2b that is the question of this philosophical t-shirt and it can be answered by the type of sketch you're making. If you are drawing Russell Brand (or if YOU are Russell Brand doing a self-portrait) 2B would be needed.
The third chap better not be at Slackbottom. Who knows how much cookie calories have already been expended by those two other people? This funny t-shirt might get you a few chuckles every now and then so get one!
And if people try to argue with your confident statement you can just buy them the shirt to stop the envy and the hate. This funny shirt is something the vocalist of System of a Down is allowed to wear.
This may sound like the start of a modified Konami Code or a sign for people reppin' Virginia but it's actually about that British sitcom that made Peggy famous. Buy this nostalgic t-shirt now and buy one for your dad too!
If you talk in the cinema BUT talk about world peace that would mean you're only half evil and qualify to buy this witty t-shirt. Actually no talking in the cinema is 666 enough. So buy two shirts.
Mandela fan? Of course you are! You either like Mandela or Hitler. Wearing prison shirts may not be your fashion style but this bright orange t-shirt will show your love for the Tata. That's African for Father. No it's not some slang for chips.
The numbers Mason! What do they mean?! This combination from the greatest show ever Lost (which is obvious and non-debatable) is actually a mystery to this day. This number combination t-shirt will surely be noticed by fellow fans so buy yours now!
Like if you believe that you only 10% of your brain you might actually be using less than that! Wear this ironic t-shirt to show others how statistically correct you are!
You might wonder why 2 of those cats would want to lick anywhere else since ass is a good place to lick at which point I would advise you to visit your nearest psychologist immediately. This stats t-shirt will surely get people thinking. Didn't you?
If only we can decrease that by 26%. We live in a world where pharmacists invent pills that make us crap gold literally but nothing to raise our IQs. Not you though right? You're in the top 10% so buy this funny stats t-shirt now!
Hey bro we're being totally creative all day here. Now it's YOUR time to be creative! This minimalist t-shirt is your chance to show just how insanely artistic or just artistic or just insane your mind is. Not for sketching though.
If you met a guy who is desperately trying to sell you his nudes even though both of you are guys and you're too passive-aggressive to call him out you can just wear this code t-shirt and show it to him.
...and sitting at home with the trouble and strife.
England birthed football into this world but they've become one of the most booed out teams. There was even a campaign to support "Anyone but England" but we can still change that with this statement t-shirt that says Always Bet England!
For people who are neither brain-munching undead or female arseholes this punny t-shirt is one apparel to wear. We're pretty sure you're hating on both of the unwanted species mentioned in the shirt but hey! It'll look good and make you feel witty!
Before going on a date with the green lady make sure that you're prepared to hallucinate! Illusions do not come in the dragon or unicorn variety but it's sweet daydreaming nonetheless. This absinthe t-shirt is an acknowledgement of the drink.
Sync 100% and go back to the past to murder guards and civilians alike. Abstergo is the fictional company that took virtual reality to a history-altering new level. This geeky shirt let's templars know that you're not one to mess with.
A funny design for people with a good sense of humour and who like racing and fixing cars.
Why stop at cuddling? Why not cuddle then Battista bomb each other lovingly? Okay maybe that's not as romantic as it sounds but you can wear this reminder t-shirt to show your significant other that you want some hugs and kisses.
A cup of tea solves everything! Even your neighbor's TV signal reception. If the whole world drank a lot more tea we would be as peaceful as Mars. Wear this overly English t-shirt to show just how much you love this nerve-calming drink.
Don't you just hate it when you're trying to internalize Back in Black and suddenly HOLY COW AS IN LITERALLY THAT BOVINE IS WALKING ON WATER. This band pun t-shirt is for the people who can't focus on 10 things at once so they focus on 9.
There's lots of barking picking up poop and broken appliances but these tail-wagging furballs will give you all their love and make you smile at the end of the day so get this pet-lover t-shirt now and try to make it till the end of the day.
Want to hear a racist comment? Sorry but we don't promote racism. Get one of these funny t-shirts now for you or your friends because the humor is dark and full of terrors.
Straightforward: that's the way to roll! This attention-getting t-shirt will get you a lot of looks not only because it's red and has a clear call for attention design at the front but because of the vibe... You know? The vibe?
Wimpy but plenty to like? This nerdy t-shirt is for people who are having genuine problems blending in with this highly look-biased society but overcome them with heaps of personality and unique charm!
...And there he ordered a bottle of milk before sleeping in the exaggerated cushions. This one-liner t-shirt is enough as an ice breaker so you can wear this in your next party (if they are still inviting you) to easily start conversations.
Never feel oppressed when people tell you you're too old or too young to do something! The perfect response to all those naysayers: this graphic print t-shirt showcases flawless logic. It won't get you into any real age-restricted places but at least you'll look cool!
There's nothing like a hard day's work! But then again there's nothing quite like a lazy day at home either. You can do the math. I'll be at home relaxing. And so can you with this straight-to-the-point no nonsense t-shirt!
You know that they say beggars can't be choosers! And sometimes you won't even have a choice at all. When desperation strikes and the need for companionship is too great this helpful statement shirt does all the talking. So you can have all the sexy! Disclaimer: Sexy not guaranteed.